man, i wish it was one day. at least it'd be over by now.
life isn't the most fun now. it's not that i cant find fun or that i'm not having any fun. it's just that... i'm not having fun. even as i write that i realize how many great things i have. but this stuff with my parents is just wearing me down (and i've only been truly in the midst of it for a week now. i knew about the situation in general for 6 months and it wasn't that i didn't want to help; i just didnt think it was my place to do more than listen and comfort.) like, i don't even want to stop doing anything because it'll give me time to think about it. i've been playing guitar and listening to music just non-stop to keep my mind occupied.
you think just graduating's hard? try graduating, getting married, working 50 hrs a week, and having your parents try and get divorced all in 6 months. not to mention the fact that jess and i are not living in Mt. Juliet or Knoxville for the first time in 5 years and we don't have a steady church yet. we have to drive 6 mi to go exercise and neither that nor internet is even close to being free.
i'm just glad i have jesse with me. this would not be fun without her.
and it's not that i'm truly worried about my place or what's going to happen with our lives because i know God has it and i'd much rather Him have it than me. even though i know all this, it still doesnt mean i'm having a good time. it's like, for the past 5 years i've had the overall goal of graduating and getting a job. well, i've done that, so now what do i do? where do i go from here? where do we go from here?